Actually most experts agree that indeed it is good to argue but there are conditions which must be understood and applied.
In fact it wouldn't be normal, especially in the early stages of a developing relationship, to never argue.
In some part it's where the lines get drawn and couples learn what will and won't be accepted from either party in terms of behaviour.
It's an old adage that we teach people how to treat us and it's really true.
The thing about arguing is that it's enormously strength building, each time an argument occurs and gets resolved somehow the relationship feels closer and more intimate.
At least that's the way it's supposed to work! It's a question of how road tough is your relationship? Can it survive arguments and are both parties able to argue constructively without trying to destroy the other persons sense of self worth in the process.
That's very important.
Being able to argue constructively with your partner is a true sign of compatibility.
So aside from arguing without trying to destroy your partner and 'win', what's the most important thing to achieve at the end of it all? Well it's got to be resolution, without achieving real resolution after fights the prognosis for your relationship is not good.
It's like collecting baggage that will only get heavier and heavier with each passing argument until finally you break up.
Above all the thing to look for is love; does your partner get upset at the thought of hurting your feelings? Do they really care if you are unhappy? So much so that they are willing to try to change the behaviour responsible for it? Are they willing to listen to why you are unhappy or hurt and want to change it? When you have that in a relationship it's really, really special.
Someone who will simply listen to you.