Most of us, when we want to get our ex back, think we have to do a lot of talking.
Fast talking to convince them to take us back.
This is completely understandable.
However, often times it is completely incorrect.
Talking too much can get you into more trouble.
If you tell your ex that he or she should take you back, it probably won't work.
All that does is make them more sure that they don't want you.
The pressure is usually going to backfire.
The more you try to convince some people to change their minds, the more often they will decide to do the reverse.
So what can you do instead of fast talking your head off? What can you do instead of come across like a used car salesman? What can you besides sending twenty text messages a day hoping for a response? There are many things.
One vital and important thing you can do in the process of making up with your ex is to be quiet and listen to his or her feelings.
Ask them how they feel about what happened.
Ask them how they feel about you and what bothers them.
These questions can seem scary.
We are afraid they will dump all over us, yelling and screaming.
If you cheated on your mate, they should yell and scream.
We all tend to think, why should I ask them what they are feeling? I already know what they are feeling.
They are mad and they hate me.
Yes, they are mad, and yes, they may hate you.
So why should you ask them to tell you how they feel? Because this is the way to help people resolve and release negative feelings.
It is called "getting things off your chest.
" If you are mad and you hold it inside, you will stay mad longer.
The thing to do is to man or woman up and help them to get things off their chest.
Let them rage at you or sob and cry for a while.
This is a healthy process, if you don't argue and scream back or try to justify or make them feel better.
Just make them feel heard and understood.
Be a good listener.
This can touch their heart.
There's more to it, but just this is a good start.