Finding a Good Marriage Counselor

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The high divorce rate has a devastating affect on children.
The family disintegrates and the partners have to move out and take new accommodation.
They remain full of stress and resentment for a long time before and after divorce.
Divorce is not good for the society either.
Marriage is the basic building block of human civilisation.
It provides a secure and safe atmosphere for the children to grow up in.
Its decline may gradually destabilise the entire society and lead to destroyed relationships and social chaos.
Divorce in a family can happen due to many reasons.
These range from physical and emotional abuse to infidelity and desertion.
Whenever you feel your marriage has begun its death spiral toward divorce, perhaps the most important thing you can do is to look for a marriage counsellor.
Marriage counselors are trained professional who can help save your marriage by giving expert advice.
They listen to your marital problems, comprehend the situation and offer practical solutions to get the relationship back on the track.
Counseling is a unique process.
It is at the same time quite professional as well as personal as it deals with very intimate issues.
Finding a good counsellor can actually go a long way in saving your marriage and staving off divorce.
Looking for a Counselor Flipping through the Yellow Pages is perhaps the most effective way to find some marriage counselors in your area.
You should make a list of about three or four who look most promising.
Another very good way is to talk to your friends or relatives who may have seen a counsellor at some point in their lives.
Their advice grounded in personal experience would be genuine and invaluable.
Once you have short-listed some candidates, you should speak to them over the phone to get information such as their charges, experience and qualifications.
After you have decided on the one that seems suitable, you should take an appointment.
It will be ideal if you and your partner both go to meet the counsellor.
It that is not possible, you will still gain a lot by going alone.
First Session Sessions with a marriage counsellor typically last about an hour.
In the first session, some counselors meet both the partners at the same time.
However, there are also those who meet each partner alone for 15 minutes each to gain their individual perspectives about what is wrong with the relationship.
The first session is really a familiarization trip.
You get to meet the counsellor and know if he or she is suitable for you or not.
The counsellor, in turn, will ask you what you expect from counseling.
After this, you may have to fill up some forms that will help the counsellor understand and evaluate your marital problem.
Second Session The second session follows within a few days - about a week or so - after the first session.
This session is longer than the first one, and takes a couple of hours.
Here you and the counsellor decide the strategy to overcome your marital problem.
The counsellor, having met you and gone through the forms, will outline the plan that will bring your marriage back on the rails.
It is important for you to give your inputs.
Once you have agreed to the plan, it should be put in writing.
Some counselors are dedicated and create a treatment plan in the second or third session itself.
There are others who take several sessions to come up with it.
If you think that the counsellor is taking too long, it is better to look for another one.
Treatment After the second session, the treatment plan comes into effect.
You meet the counsellor every week and apprise him or her about the progress or problems that you are experiencing.
The counsellor guides you through the process, coming up with unique solutions, clearing emotional minefields and motivating you every step of the way.
If the treatment plan is effective, it is only a matter of time before the friction in your relationship begins to ebb away.
You can attend the counseling sessions as long as you want until you think they are no longer needed.
Good counselors can extend tremendous help to you in your marital crisis.
If your marriage is in the docks and nothing seems to work, they may be your only chance to give your relationship one last shot.
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