Reversing The Divorce Decision - 4 Things That WILL Work
You're a travelling man.
Your company has you going all over the country and occasionally abroad on their business.
You enjoy your job, but when you come home, your wife has always been up to her do-it-yourself projects.
Re-decorating this, changing this room around, making that room into something it wasn't when you went away.
The big problem is that you always criticize what she's done.
She never asks you first, just goes ahead and does what she thinks looks good.
There have been occasions when what she's done has been so outrageous in your opinion, that you've made her change it back to the way it was originally.
You yourself can't stand do-it-yourself projects, but you feel that this doesn't give your wife license to carry on as she thinks fit.
She has this interior designer, a woman you can't stand, who eggs her on with these extraordinary ideas.
You arrived home yesterday, to find that the drawing room looked more like a funeral parlour than the welcoming area it should be.
You both had a an almighty row, and your wife stormed off to bed.
But you're a reasonable man, and you sat up half the night, thinking about the whole situation.
Even so, you were more than a little surprised when your wife appeared the next morning in the kitchen, saying she wanted a divorce.
Ploy #1.
Try To Keep Your Cool.
Bear in mind that she's been up half the night herself, thinking of how to broach this to you.
So she's probably pretty strung out.
"Oh dear, I really didn't think it had come to this.
I must say, luv, I really don't want a divorce.
" She tells you that all you do is to criticize everything she does in the house.
You don't like DIY projects, but she does and besides you're always away.
Now here she has a very good point, so Ploy #2.
Don't Argue.
"I did a lot of thinking myself last night, luv, and yes, I quite see your point.
" Stop right there.
Don't overdo it.
Divorce has seemed the only way out for her, so she presses home with what's becoming a diminishing advantage.
"It's come to the stage where I'm frightened to touch anything in the house for fear of being criticized.
" Ploy #3.
Agree.
"Yes.
Yes, I take your point.
I suddenly turn up and don't give you any credit for what you've done at all.
I don't even discuss it, do I?" Ploy #4.
Listen.
You may have to jog her a wee bit, but let her tell you everything that's on her mind.
Again, do not argue.
Some of the things she shoots at you may seem unfair, but all that's for another day.
Let her really lay it on you.
Remember that this decision of her's to ask for a divorce hasn't been easy for her, but by being an attentive and sympathetic listener, you're disarming her, de-fusing the situation and starting to bring the very shaky ship of matrimony back on an even keel.
Your company has you going all over the country and occasionally abroad on their business.
You enjoy your job, but when you come home, your wife has always been up to her do-it-yourself projects.
Re-decorating this, changing this room around, making that room into something it wasn't when you went away.
The big problem is that you always criticize what she's done.
She never asks you first, just goes ahead and does what she thinks looks good.
There have been occasions when what she's done has been so outrageous in your opinion, that you've made her change it back to the way it was originally.
You yourself can't stand do-it-yourself projects, but you feel that this doesn't give your wife license to carry on as she thinks fit.
She has this interior designer, a woman you can't stand, who eggs her on with these extraordinary ideas.
You arrived home yesterday, to find that the drawing room looked more like a funeral parlour than the welcoming area it should be.
You both had a an almighty row, and your wife stormed off to bed.
But you're a reasonable man, and you sat up half the night, thinking about the whole situation.
Even so, you were more than a little surprised when your wife appeared the next morning in the kitchen, saying she wanted a divorce.
Ploy #1.
Try To Keep Your Cool.
Bear in mind that she's been up half the night herself, thinking of how to broach this to you.
So she's probably pretty strung out.
"Oh dear, I really didn't think it had come to this.
I must say, luv, I really don't want a divorce.
" She tells you that all you do is to criticize everything she does in the house.
You don't like DIY projects, but she does and besides you're always away.
Now here she has a very good point, so Ploy #2.
Don't Argue.
"I did a lot of thinking myself last night, luv, and yes, I quite see your point.
" Stop right there.
Don't overdo it.
Divorce has seemed the only way out for her, so she presses home with what's becoming a diminishing advantage.
"It's come to the stage where I'm frightened to touch anything in the house for fear of being criticized.
" Ploy #3.
Agree.
"Yes.
Yes, I take your point.
I suddenly turn up and don't give you any credit for what you've done at all.
I don't even discuss it, do I?" Ploy #4.
Listen.
You may have to jog her a wee bit, but let her tell you everything that's on her mind.
Again, do not argue.
Some of the things she shoots at you may seem unfair, but all that's for another day.
Let her really lay it on you.
Remember that this decision of her's to ask for a divorce hasn't been easy for her, but by being an attentive and sympathetic listener, you're disarming her, de-fusing the situation and starting to bring the very shaky ship of matrimony back on an even keel.
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