Love is a continuously growing process, and effective marriages are ones that are continually developing in each of the spouses learning to understand each other's thoughts and desires.
The relationship should never ever stop growing in this way.
But that is just not the way it is for some couples.
Many find their marriage in difficulties and are asking the question ("How can I save my marriage?").
Are you asking that question right now? Because there is a lot o good help out there.
You may find it through your pastor or a group designed to help in this way.
It could be from a professional councilor or on the internet through eBooks or articles like this.
But know that you don't have to work through your problems on your own.
All of us need help along the way at some point in our lives.
The reason you find yourself in need of saving your marriage can be the result of something happening in your lives causing your relationship to fall apart.
Sometimes it happens as a result of the death of someone really close like a child.
It could result though from any serious problem in your relationship resulting from money issues, addictions, or emotional issues etc.
Any of these can cause your world to fall apart putting stress on your relationship that starts causing it to fall apart.
Whatever the situation it is very important that you not try to change your spouse.
They are the only one that can modify their actions or change.
Instead however you need to look at yourself.
People will always make mistakes including yourself, and we must all learn how to rectify them without blaming someone else especially if they are in a marriage.
What is extremely important is that you acknowledge the situation between the two of you and find a solution that resolves the problem.
Work on the solutions together where possible.
For example, to help solve the problem of your marriage suffering from busy schedules, figure out how to spend time with each other without distractions.
Learning how to communicate better may be one of the simplest tips you can get but actually learning how to listen and communicate effectively is a task that takes a lot of effort.
Everyone is unique; we see things differently, have our own opinion and idea about many things.
Therefore it is important to give each other time and space to grow as individuals.
I am not talking about separation here though sometimes that helps but I am talking about respect for each other that allows each to grow as people.
When we know who we are as people we can bring a firmer foundation to a marriage relationship.
Love really is one of the greatest human bonds.
Love is what motivated you when you first met and it is often what makes married couples stay close and happy.
Marriage should always be the result of love.
So when the love has gone out of a marriage it's difficult.
You may be feeling torn between the love you still have for your partner and the desire to work on your marriage and the troublesome feelings that it's gone too far.
But if you still love your spouse and feel that you want to give your marriage another chance, I encourage you to go for it.
Your spouse probably has similar feelings but has problems trusting you, themselves or their feelings and certainly finds it difficult to talk about it.
So I will say it again.
If you still love your spouse and want to save your marriage, it is always worth the effort.
Committing to your relationship will help you get through this together.