If you remarry someone with children, you want the transition into the new relationship and marriage to be easy. Below are a few tips to help you transition into you role as parent in a blended family. Read them and commit yourself to using them in your new blended family.

For The Biological Parent:

1. Create family structure.

2. Establish clear boundaries and consequences to crossing those boundaries.

3. Allow your children to have some control and give input regarding those boundaries.

4. Be a positive role model to your children.

5. Don’t stifle your children. Allow them to express their feelings and concerns over the newly blended family.

6. Make sure you have alone time with your spouse.

7. Plan activities that the family as a whole can participate in.

8. What you do matter, with every action you are setting an example for your children and step-children. Set a good one!

9. Stay involved in your children's lives. You've remarried but they are still your top priority, don't let them forget that.

10. Adapt your parenting to fit the needs of both your children and step-children. They are each individuals with separate needs. Meet those needs!

For the Stepparent:

1. Focus on the positive aspects of each child’s personality. Only focusing on the negative breeds contempt and there is no room in the step-parent relationship for contempt.

2. Support the biological parent when it comes to discipline.

A biologica parent doesn't need the input of a step-parent when disciplining their children. 

3. Act as a guide or friend to your step-child. Do not try to become his/her parent. You aren't their real parent, deal with that and help them deal also. 

4. Be prepared for it to take time for your stepchild to bond with you.

5. Never use unkind words, only positive communication and affirmations are acceptable.

6. Don’t get discouraged. Don’t expect an instant bond and try to learn the virtue of patience.

7. Acknowledge your step-children's loss. They may not view you are a "gain." Allow them those feelings and validate them if they feel loss. 

8. Contrary to belief, children aren't resilient. Too many changes at once can be emotionally unsettling. Don't expect your step-children to adapt to change as quickly as you do.

9. Be ready to hear the words, "you're not my real parent" and don't take it personally. You will never be viewed as a parent by your step-child but, given time, you will become bonded and share a deep love and respect. 

10. Plan outings with your step-children. Nothing promotes bonding more than shared fun. Get out and about with them and develop that bond!

Parenting, whether it is your biological child or step-child can be a lovely experience. There is nothing easy about parenting regardless of your role in a child's life. The job of a parent is to prepare children to function highly as adults. You will get different answers from different experts when asking for parenting tips. They key to great parenting is to realize that, the job is a privilege, and loads and loads of love tempered with boundary setting is what any child needs to succeed in life. Good luck!