Updated November 01, 2014.

In part one of this piece, we talked about the basics of visualization and compared two different scenarios for dropping a loved one off at senior care; one in which our hypothetical caregiver allowed their mind and thoughts to run wild and break into some really gloomy, catastrophic scenarios, and one in which the hypothetical caregiver talked to themselves in a specific way, on purpose in order to create a more scenario.

Visualization is not magic, circumstances don't get better because we imagine them to get better, at least not exactly, rather we imagine the circumstances in a way that contributes to our positive mindset and helps create an atmosphere of problem solving rather than hand wringing. A few important further points about visualization: 

• Visualization is not positive thinking, although it may increase your ability to think positively in more situations. Positive thinking is not always a helpful thing, in fact, in situations where intense or delicate problem solving skills are needed, realistic thinking is much more valuable than positive thinking. However, trying to strip your thought processes of their automatic negative rumination cycle is a part of visualization. It doesn't mean that you will start thinking like Pollyanna, only that you won't be thinking like Debbie Downer. 
• Visualization doesn't require any special equipment or really any special technique. The biggest thing is when you feel yourself thinking about a situation, especially an upcoming situation in way that is increasing your stress, stop the thought train immediately and replace it with another train. Visualization can sometimes be as simple as the recognition itself of the runaway train that is our brains! 

• If you find yourself constantly engaged in negative circular thinking about the same problem or event, you might find it useful to make an MP3 that will lead you through a more positive visualization. Write yourself out a script first; take the entire event or problem minute by minute and describe a more positive outcome, especially in regards to your reaction (since that is the only thing you ultimately have control over) and use your senses to describe exactly what you will do, what will happen, how will it sound, even what the smells will be (if that's appropriate), how specifically you will manage your stress so that you can have the reaction that you would prefer to have, etc. Then read this this script into your voice recording app on your smart phone. Start listening to it several times a day until you have a better handle on stopping this pattern without the help of the recording.
• If at first you don't succeed, you didn't do it wrong. Sometimes it can take visualization a while to help you change your habits. If you're particularly frustrated with a specific scenario and listening to your MP3 isn't changing your thought processes, it might make sense to start with something a little easier. Do you find yourself frustrated with your dog's behavior? Maybe you can visualization being patient and firm in those situations and then work yourself up to situations involving your loved one. Although you might not want to tell them you practiced the technique on the family pet first. 
• Visualization can also help with retraining your brain to see more positive and possibly more probable explanations for other people's difficult behavior. If you are having trouble understanding why your kids, or your care recipient acts the way they do, if you visualize how your behavior is different, you might understand how theirs could change too.