Here is an amazing list of funny football quotes to help you enjoy the upcoming season. Whether you're a football fan, player or coach...these humorous football quotes will help you see the lighter side of the game.

Enjoy these football quotes and have a great season!

20 Humorous Football Quotes

Funny Football Quote #1

I wouldn't ever set out to hurt anyone deliberately unless it was, you know, important -like a league game or something.

Dick Butkus

Funny Football Quote #2

Most football teams are temperamental. That's 90% temper and 10% mental.

Doug Plank

Funny Football Quote #3

I want to rush for 1,000 or 1,500 yards, whichever comes first.

George Rogers

Funny Football Quote #4

Football is easy if you're crazy as hell.

Bo Jackson

Funny Football Quote #5

Nobody in football should be called a genius. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein.

Joe Theismann

Funny Football Quote #6

Pro football is like nuclear warfare. There are no winners, only survivors.

Frank Gifford

Funny Football Quote #7

If a man watches three football games in a row, he should be declared legally dead.

Erma Bombeck

Funny Football Quote #8

When I went to Catholic high school in Philadelphia, we just had one coach for football and basketball. He took all of us who turned out and had us run through a forest. The ones who ran into the trees were on the football team.

George Raveling

Funny Football Quote #9

If my mother put on a helmet and shoulder pads and a uniform that wasn't the same as the one I was wearing, I'd run over her if she was in my way. And I love my mother.

Bo Jackson

Funny Football
Quote #10

Sharks are as tough as those football fans who take their shirts off during games in Chicago in January, only more intelligent.

Dave Barry

Funny Football Quote #11

Football is, after all, a wonderful way to get rid of your aggressions without going to jail for it.

Heywood Hale Braun

Funny Football Quote #12

Sure, luck means a lot in football. Not having a good quarterback is bad luck.

Don Shula

Funny Football Quote #13

Football isn't a contact sport, it's a collision sport. Dancing is a contact sport.

Duffy Daugherty

Funny Football Quote #14

I'd catch a punt naked, in the snow, in Buffalo, for a chance to play in the NFL.

Steve Henderson

Funny Football Quote #15

Baseball players are smarter than football players. How often do you see a baseball team penalized for too many men on the field?

Jim Bouton

Funny Football Quote #16

You have to play this game like somebody just hit your mother with a two-by-four.

Dan Birdwell

Funny Football Quote #17

I've found that prayers work best when you have big players.

Knute Rockne

Funny Football Quote #18

American football makes rugby look like a Tupperware party.

Sue Lawley

Funny Football Quote #19

I've been big ever since I was little.

William "The Refrigerator" Perry

Funny Football Quote #20

We can't run. We can't pass. We can't stop the run. We can't stop the pass. We can't kick. Other than that, we're just not a very good football team right now.

Bruce Coslet