Returning to work after mat leave was much different than I expected.
Although I was worried about how my daughter would cope at daycare, I was excited about being making a contribution again through my job.
When I left for maternity leave, I had a great boss that I was getting to know well, very competent coworkers, and I enjoyed the social life there as well.
My skills were up to date so I thought that I could just pick up where I left off.
I felt so naive, since a lot of changes can happen when you are gone.
Much to my surprise, the temp replacement that I helped to hire to fill my position was fitting in a little too well.
So much so, that they wanted to keep him on full time and offer him what was my dream job title.
I had been waiting for this opportunity to come up for a long time, and I was very surprised at how quickly I had lost my place in the company.
Granted, my skills were not super up to date after being away for a while, but it would be very easy to pick up any changes and update my skills quickly.
Being part of a union, I thought that when this perfect job was posted, my many years of seniority, updated education which the company paid $13,000 for my training, as well as reputation within the team would mean that I would be a solid competitor for the job.
After all, this guy I was up against was just a temp.
I barely knew him, but the major thing that stood in my way from successfully acquiring this position was that my new manager knew him very well and liked him.
I guess I couldn't really expect to come back to everything being the same.
The new manager was determined to hire him for this role.
I still persevered and when it came time for the interview for the role, I studied hard on behavioral interview questions as well as ones that would show I had the skills for the job.
I thought the interview went well and after, I sent a carefully worded thank you letter - something very few people do these days but it gives you an edge.
Although I was thanked for the letter, it did not have the desired effect.
I remember it so vividly.
My birthday was the following Monday and I had built up an ample amount of holidays, so I asked to take that Monday off.
I didn't tell him it was my birthday that day, and I was denied the day off because he wanted to book a 30 minute meeting with me Monday.
I thought it would be good news, but sadly, it was to tell me that I didn't get the job.
Not at all the wonderful birthday news I was expecting.
He went on to tell me the reasons of how my replacement while I was on leave had more experience.
He also told me that - through no fault of my own since I was on maternity leave - I didn't finish the project I was on before giving birth.
That was a strike against me.
Ouch! Although it was a dream job, I decided it was not worth fighting even though I knew that I would stand a very decent chance of winning through our union.
Why? Because the key thing I missed out on being away was the close relations that formed while I was gone with the temp replacing me and my fellow coworkers that used to be my strong allies.
Now he was the one they were routing for.
I was out of sight, out of mind and felt I would not be missed leaving again.
Besides, if I was a manager, I may also favour the person with the most current skills.
I was sad about not getting the job, but strongly believe things happen for a reason.
Even though I lost some strong ties at work, there were other things that changed in my life to focus on instead that had greater importance, like my family.
Then my luck changed.
I was about to visit the IVF specialist for a second time a few days later to see if it was possible to have another child.
He told me it was a long shot and not to get my hopes up because I didn't respond well to treatment the first time and was much older now.
Statistically, it was almost an impossibility at this point.
However, just 6 days later, I discovered I was pregnant with my second child.
It was the kind of news that overshadowed being overlooked for a job promotion after mat leave.
Fate works in funny ways sometimes and being a parent is better than any other job out there in my opinion.