Being a stay at home mom can be a rewarding experience--it can also be a lonely and frustrating experience.
While nothing beats the peace of mind knowing your children are well cared for and loved, the sacrifice of being home can take its toll.
So the million dollar question is: how to balance the joy of staying home with your kids versus the need to find personal fulfillment? 1.
Understand and accept reality Some moms feel guilty when they don't feel fulfilled by raising their children fulltime.
Some days it can feel like your life is an exercise in futility.
For everything you do, someone undoes it faster! There are days when it seems whining children, spilled milk and dirty laundry are the norm.
That's not fulfilling and it is OK to feel that way.
By accepting this fact, you can move forward without beating yourself up about the reality: being a stay at home mom is not all wine and roses.
2.
Seek out opportunities Often working mother's say they work outside the home because they need to feel fulfilled.
Working mothers love their children as much as stay at home moms, and on the flip side, stay at home moms need personal fulfillment as much as working moms.
Stay at home moms need to understand that it is okay to seek out opportunities to socialize and find activities they enjoy.
I have a friend who loves to scrapbook.
It is an activity that helps her relax.
Two or three times a year she plans scrapbook getaways with her friends.
They generally spend the weekend at one person's home and share meal duties.
The weekends are an opportunity to recharge her batteries and enjoy her time away.
After scrapbooking weekend she appreciates everyone a little more.
And, after spending the weekend alone with the children, her husband appreciates her more too! Other ways to feel fulfilled are to find activities that include both children and adults.
One example is public library story time programs.
At my local library the moms take the children to the program and spend the next 45 minutes chatting with the other moms.
Afterward, on pleasant days, the group goes to the park to play.
Our rule is the moms are there to supervise the children, not play with them.
This is an easy way to connect with others while providing your child with an opportunity socialize.
Building relationships with other moms is important to ward off loneliness.
3.
Take time for yourself This is a tough one for all moms.
It is hard to say, "I am going to take 30 minutes every day just for myself.
" Moms are programmed to be everything for everyone, so of course we don't feel like there is time for us.
Make a list of all the things you enjoy and see how you can work some of those things into your schedule.
For me, running is my escape.
I am a much better mom and wife when I have taken time to exercise.
For you it may be reading or knitting.
Whatever it is, take time for you-you deserve it! 4.
Enjoy the moments One advantage of being home with your children is the front row seat you have for their childhood.
On those most harried days, remember that this job won't last forever.
Sooner than you are ready your children will need you less.
Take time to appreciate the funny, silly or sweet things they do and say.
Those are the moments that help get you through the days that are less than fun.
Children really are funny little people, and they really do appreciate having mom home all day.
For over 10 years I have been home with my children.
I cannot put a price on the time we have spent together.
I sleep well knowing every night that my day was well spent because it was spent with my children.