I am the father of a 2.
5 year old girl and my wife is pregnant with our son, who is due in December.
The last 2.
5 years have been the best years of my life and the time with my daughter has been the most exciting time that I have ever had.
Below are some lessons that I have learned over the last 2.
5 years that I will take into fathering my second child.
These tips for a first time dad may be beneficial for any first time (or maybe even repeat) parent, but they are really geared towards the dad - 1.
In the beginning, she may not seek out dad.
That does not mean that she never will - The toughest times for me would be when my daughter would cry and I would pick her up and her crying would escalate because she wanted the comfort of my wife, or grandma, or grandpa, or the milkman.
Basically, she wanted everybody but me in those moments.
Even thought, intellectually, I knew it was not about me, it still hurt.
After times passed, she became daddy's little girl.
However, that cycle was fleeting as well.
2.
Don't hang on the past too much - Their development was rapid and exciting.
Even though I mourned the loss of each period, I realized that it only kept getting better as she got older.
I remember when she became potty trained.
I was sad because I thought the little diapers looked so cute.
Now, I can't imagine having to go back to changing diapers, since we can go out the whole day and my bathroom duties are limited to taking her to the bathroom and watching her wash her hands for 5 minutes.
3.
We really want them to grow and that is the measure of our success - As my daughter becomes more independent (or should I say defiant), it is more challenging.
Many times I yearn for the moments when she would do anything that I asked her.
Although, it is sometimes difficult to work with her, we have to remember that they are independent beings and need to grow.
4.
Put down the camera and experience the moment - I have missed so many magical moments as a first time dad because I wanted to capture those moments on camera.
The camera shots never live up to the experience of the moment.
If the camera is handy, then take a picture.
If it is not handy, then don't worry about it and just enjoy the moment.
5.
Listen to what they are saying and honor it - I do not know if this is something that I did not know before but it is worth reinforcing.
As they develop language skills, make sure to listen to what they are saying and honor the work that they have done to communicate with an appropriate response.
Too many times, I have just assumed that she is babbling and not tried to truly listen to what she is saying.
I probably missed some real gems because of this.
6.
Keep the relationship with the mother fresh - When my relationship with my wife is working well, then everything seems to be working well.
When we keep that relationship fresh and are communication well, there is a sense of peace and harmony in the house.
When we do not, well then anything is possible, and that is never a good thing.
Parenting is the best gift in life and deserves to be cherished.
Enjoy the ride as a first time dad and make sure you are there for the experience.