How To Make Gratitude a Habit
We often take for granted the very things that most deserve our gratitude. ~ Cynthia Ozick
Sometimes chaos, stress and the usual busyness that accompanies everyday life can get the best of us. Throw in deployments, PCS moves and the numerous other variables related to military life, and it's easy to understand why we might take for granted many of the people, events, opportunities and blessings in our life and/or feel depleted, emotionally, mentally and physically.
However, we can change our outlook—and fast—by merely adding gratitude to our lives.
Gratitude is a powerful tool that we all possess. It's free, limitless and always at our disposal. If you're searching for simple ways to incorporate more gratitude into your life, consider the following:
1. Think Grateful Thoughts
It's very easy to get caught up in negative thinking. Whenever you find a negative thought racing through your head, stop and replace it by thinking about what you're grateful for. To get even more mileage out of the process, throughout the day think about things, people, pets and events that you're grateful for.
As time passes you'll probably notice that "grateful thinking" has become a habit. You'll find yourself silently giving thanks when something that you once took for granted occurs, such as getting a green light at an intersection on a day that you're in no particular hurry. (Unlike the chants of thanks that are often verbalized when we get a green light on a day that were rushed and running late.)
2. Verbalize Your Thanks
Simply saying, "Thank you," or "I'm so thankful that you're in my life," can work wonders for not only you but the recipient as well.
Think about it, when was the last time someone told you that they are thankful to have you in their life? Now, imagine hearing those words from a friend, family member or co-worker. Does the thought leave you feeling appreciated and/or happy? Well, that's exactly what the other person feels when you say those words (or the equivalent) to them.
3. Show Your Gratitude
Expressing your gratitude through actions can be extremely rewarding. Surprise a family member by making them their favorite meal or doing something extra-kind. When they ask, "What's the special occasion," or "What's this for?" you can take great joy in simply saying, "Because I appreciate you…"
Additionally, don't forget that children learn from their parents. By expressing your gratitude, whether through words or actions, you're inadvertently teaching your kids the importance of gratitude—a valuable coping skill that may serve them well during challenging times in their life.
4. Keep a Gratitude Journal
Each day write down things that you're grateful for. This is especially important when you're having one of those not-so-stellar days. By doing so you'll shift your mind away from the negatives while purposefully seeking out the positives.
For example, instead of cursing your latest auto insurance bill, write down how grateful you are to have a vehicle to insure—a vehicle that gets you from point A to point B.
As the months and years pass, look back in your gratitude journal and reread what you wrote. This is particularly helpful during trying times because you'll see just how blessed you really are—perhaps to the point of being grateful for your current crises because you know the end result will lead to some type of change or personal growth.
5. Write a Gratitude Letter
Steve Toepfer, associate professor in Human Development and Family Studies at Kent State University knew that people who received gratitude letters benefited from the writings, but what about the people who wrote the letters? Did they see an improvement in their overall happiness and well-being? To answer his question he conducted a study on the power of writing gratitude letters. Participants in the study were instructed that the letters had to be meaningful, not a simple "thank you" note scratched off in a hurried manner. Once the pilot study was completed, Toepfer examined the differences between those who wrote letters of gratitude and participants who did not.
"As they wrote, up to three letters, results showed increasing benefits. The more letter writing people did, the more they improved significantly on happiness and life satisfaction. The new and potentially important finding is that depressive symptoms decreased. By writing these letters—15 to 20 minutes each, once a week for three weeks to different people—well-being increased significantly," Toepfer said in a news release.
For the complete details about this study, please see Letters of Gratitude: Further Evidence for Author Benefits featured in the Journal of Happiness Studies.
"We have this powerful resource we're carrying with us, but we need to tap into it in order to let it work for us," Toepfer said in regards to gratitude and the difference it can make in a person's life.
Gratitude Exercise
Over the course of a month, do your best to add more gratitude to your life. Alter your thoughts, actions and words to reflect those of thankfulness and appreciation. At the end of the month assess your findings. Are you happier? Do you feel content and have more inner-peace? Less stressed?
Books About Gratitude
Whether you want to read more about the power of gratitude and how it can benefit you or you're searching for a gratitude journal, the following list may prove useful:
Sometimes chaos, stress and the usual busyness that accompanies everyday life can get the best of us. Throw in deployments, PCS moves and the numerous other variables related to military life, and it's easy to understand why we might take for granted many of the people, events, opportunities and blessings in our life and/or feel depleted, emotionally, mentally and physically.
However, we can change our outlook—and fast—by merely adding gratitude to our lives.
Gratitude is a powerful tool that we all possess. It's free, limitless and always at our disposal. If you're searching for simple ways to incorporate more gratitude into your life, consider the following:
1. Think Grateful Thoughts
It's very easy to get caught up in negative thinking. Whenever you find a negative thought racing through your head, stop and replace it by thinking about what you're grateful for. To get even more mileage out of the process, throughout the day think about things, people, pets and events that you're grateful for.
As time passes you'll probably notice that "grateful thinking" has become a habit. You'll find yourself silently giving thanks when something that you once took for granted occurs, such as getting a green light at an intersection on a day that you're in no particular hurry. (Unlike the chants of thanks that are often verbalized when we get a green light on a day that were rushed and running late.)
2. Verbalize Your Thanks
Simply saying, "Thank you," or "I'm so thankful that you're in my life," can work wonders for not only you but the recipient as well.
Think about it, when was the last time someone told you that they are thankful to have you in their life? Now, imagine hearing those words from a friend, family member or co-worker. Does the thought leave you feeling appreciated and/or happy? Well, that's exactly what the other person feels when you say those words (or the equivalent) to them.
3. Show Your Gratitude
Expressing your gratitude through actions can be extremely rewarding. Surprise a family member by making them their favorite meal or doing something extra-kind. When they ask, "What's the special occasion," or "What's this for?" you can take great joy in simply saying, "Because I appreciate you…"
Additionally, don't forget that children learn from their parents. By expressing your gratitude, whether through words or actions, you're inadvertently teaching your kids the importance of gratitude—a valuable coping skill that may serve them well during challenging times in their life.
4. Keep a Gratitude Journal
Each day write down things that you're grateful for. This is especially important when you're having one of those not-so-stellar days. By doing so you'll shift your mind away from the negatives while purposefully seeking out the positives.
For example, instead of cursing your latest auto insurance bill, write down how grateful you are to have a vehicle to insure—a vehicle that gets you from point A to point B.
As the months and years pass, look back in your gratitude journal and reread what you wrote. This is particularly helpful during trying times because you'll see just how blessed you really are—perhaps to the point of being grateful for your current crises because you know the end result will lead to some type of change or personal growth.
5. Write a Gratitude Letter
Steve Toepfer, associate professor in Human Development and Family Studies at Kent State University knew that people who received gratitude letters benefited from the writings, but what about the people who wrote the letters? Did they see an improvement in their overall happiness and well-being? To answer his question he conducted a study on the power of writing gratitude letters. Participants in the study were instructed that the letters had to be meaningful, not a simple "thank you" note scratched off in a hurried manner. Once the pilot study was completed, Toepfer examined the differences between those who wrote letters of gratitude and participants who did not.
"As they wrote, up to three letters, results showed increasing benefits. The more letter writing people did, the more they improved significantly on happiness and life satisfaction. The new and potentially important finding is that depressive symptoms decreased. By writing these letters—15 to 20 minutes each, once a week for three weeks to different people—well-being increased significantly," Toepfer said in a news release.
For the complete details about this study, please see Letters of Gratitude: Further Evidence for Author Benefits featured in the Journal of Happiness Studies.
"We have this powerful resource we're carrying with us, but we need to tap into it in order to let it work for us," Toepfer said in regards to gratitude and the difference it can make in a person's life.
Gratitude Exercise
Over the course of a month, do your best to add more gratitude to your life. Alter your thoughts, actions and words to reflect those of thankfulness and appreciation. At the end of the month assess your findings. Are you happier? Do you feel content and have more inner-peace? Less stressed?
Books About Gratitude
Whether you want to read more about the power of gratitude and how it can benefit you or you're searching for a gratitude journal, the following list may prove useful:
- Thank You Power: Making the Science of Gratitude Work for You by Deborah Norville
- Attitudes of Gratitude: How to Give and Receive Joy Every Day of Your Life by M.J. Ryan
- Simple Abundance Journal of Gratitude
- Choosing Gratitude: Your Journey to Joy by Nancy Leigh DeMoss
- Gratitude: A Daily Journal by Jack Canfield and D.D. Watkins
- The Secret Gratitude Book by Rhonda Byrne
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