How to Learn Through Arguing
- 1). Speak in a civil tone. An argument does not have to involve screaming or name-calling. Keeping the conversation respectful helps you truly understand the other point of view without negative emotions interfering with the learning process.
- 2). Listen to the other person, and allow her to finish speaking before interjecting with a retort or opinion. Arguments often degenerate into people trying to be heard instead of hearing the other person, ruining any potential learning experiences. Try to understand and empathize with the other party as she speaks, even if you continue to disagree.
- 3). Ask questions instead of making assumptions. Even if you will never agree with the other person's opinion, asking why he holds that opinion could grant you insight into facts or personal history of which you were previously unaware and that can make your relationship with that person stronger. Arguments are sometimes therapeutic for this reason and do not have to doom a friendship or romance.
- 4). Focus on the specific issue being argued. Unhealthy arguments will often degenerate into attacks, because the participants lose track of the reason for the fight and try to bring up unrelated issues to "score points" or to hurt the other person.
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