Caregiving: Five Ways to Survive the Holidays
"Will I survive the holidays?" you may ask.
I asked myself this question last year when my husband was in the Intensive Care Unit of the hospital, and asked it again when I became his caregiver.
Extensive caregiving experience (I was my mother's family caregiver for nine years, my twin grandchildren's guardian and caregiver for seven years) helped me answer this question.
I started with an attitude adjustment.
If I don't get everything done, life will continue as usual.
The world will still be spinning and the holidays will still happen.
So there is no need to pressure myself.
Instead, I can choose to practice self-compassion and take some proactive steps.
My steps may help you glide through the holidays with ease.
Choose your thoughts.
Amit Sood, MD, MSc, author of The Mayo Clinic Guide to Stress-Free Living, says choosing our thoughts helps us de-stress.
Early in the morning, when we first awaken, instead of worrying about all we need to do, he asks us to think of five people we are grateful for, people who have helped and guided us.
Doing this each morning helps you focus your mind, according to Sood, and "wake up with gratitude.
" Limit your decorating.
You don't have to climb a ladder and put lights on a tree or decorate your lawn with pricey ornaments to get into the holiday spirit.
My husband and I have "downsized" and live in a wheelchair-accessible town home.
Since we don't have much extra space, we are not putting up a large tree this year.
However, I will put a wreath on the front door and get out our table and fireplace mantle decorations.
Simplify shopping.
This year we are giving books to all of our family members.
Ordering books online has eliminated the stress of driving on ice-covered roads, through blinding snow storms, and bucking holiday crowds.
Some of our gifts will include extras -- a welcome check, a cooking gadget, or live plants.
Each book has been specially chosen for the recipient, something I know they will appreciate.
Get some help.
We live in Minnesota, land of more than 10,000 lakes and more home bakers than you can count.
Long before the holidays Minnesotans start baking and participating in cookie exchanges.
Much as I love to bake cookies, I will make only one batch, and the rest of my desserts will be store-bought.
We are hosting Thanksgiving this year and I am roasting the turkey and making salad.
Family members are bringing the rest of the meal.
Focus on the joy of the season.
Be with family members if you can and, if you can't, link up with a religious/spiritual community.
Attend holiday concerts and plays.
Go to a mall and watch children talking to Santa.
Helping others will help you get into the holiday spirit.
"The more smiles you can bring to others, the happier you are," Dr.
Amit Sood writes in his book.
Santa Claus brings gifts to children, he continues, and "we are each other's Santa Claus.
" Caregiving is a job, but it is also a gift of love.
Thanks to all caregivers -- family and paid -- who give this gift each day.
I asked myself this question last year when my husband was in the Intensive Care Unit of the hospital, and asked it again when I became his caregiver.
Extensive caregiving experience (I was my mother's family caregiver for nine years, my twin grandchildren's guardian and caregiver for seven years) helped me answer this question.
I started with an attitude adjustment.
If I don't get everything done, life will continue as usual.
The world will still be spinning and the holidays will still happen.
So there is no need to pressure myself.
Instead, I can choose to practice self-compassion and take some proactive steps.
My steps may help you glide through the holidays with ease.
Choose your thoughts.
Amit Sood, MD, MSc, author of The Mayo Clinic Guide to Stress-Free Living, says choosing our thoughts helps us de-stress.
Early in the morning, when we first awaken, instead of worrying about all we need to do, he asks us to think of five people we are grateful for, people who have helped and guided us.
Doing this each morning helps you focus your mind, according to Sood, and "wake up with gratitude.
" Limit your decorating.
You don't have to climb a ladder and put lights on a tree or decorate your lawn with pricey ornaments to get into the holiday spirit.
My husband and I have "downsized" and live in a wheelchair-accessible town home.
Since we don't have much extra space, we are not putting up a large tree this year.
However, I will put a wreath on the front door and get out our table and fireplace mantle decorations.
Simplify shopping.
This year we are giving books to all of our family members.
Ordering books online has eliminated the stress of driving on ice-covered roads, through blinding snow storms, and bucking holiday crowds.
Some of our gifts will include extras -- a welcome check, a cooking gadget, or live plants.
Each book has been specially chosen for the recipient, something I know they will appreciate.
Get some help.
We live in Minnesota, land of more than 10,000 lakes and more home bakers than you can count.
Long before the holidays Minnesotans start baking and participating in cookie exchanges.
Much as I love to bake cookies, I will make only one batch, and the rest of my desserts will be store-bought.
We are hosting Thanksgiving this year and I am roasting the turkey and making salad.
Family members are bringing the rest of the meal.
Focus on the joy of the season.
Be with family members if you can and, if you can't, link up with a religious/spiritual community.
Attend holiday concerts and plays.
Go to a mall and watch children talking to Santa.
Helping others will help you get into the holiday spirit.
"The more smiles you can bring to others, the happier you are," Dr.
Amit Sood writes in his book.
Santa Claus brings gifts to children, he continues, and "we are each other's Santa Claus.
" Caregiving is a job, but it is also a gift of love.
Thanks to all caregivers -- family and paid -- who give this gift each day.
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