A Plea to the Powers That Be
Oh please, please do not authorize the use of cell phones on airplanes in flight.
While there is still no definitive evidence that the use of such devices pose a threat to safety, common sense just shouts that allowing their use in flight is a really bad idea.
In the gate area in Memphis, while waiting to board a flight to Dallas, I was once again subjected to a consummate CePS (Cell Phone Shouter).
Yes, I could have simply gotten up and moved to a quieter area rather than sitting there allowing my eardrums to be assailed with what should have been a very private business discussion delivered at approximately 90 decibels (about the same as a front row seat at a rock concert), but I thought this might be an opportunity for "Correcting Society One Dude at a Time.
" Before going any further with my diatribe against this despicable situation, let me firmly establish the absolute righteousness of my position on this matter.
I get a new cell phone when my old one quits working.
Usually, this means the battery will no longer hold a charge and the device is so old a new battery is unavailable.
When this happens, I get the cheapest phone to be had (They give them to me free for extending my service plan.
I'm up to the year 2318 now).
So, on this cheapest of the cheap cell phone, I can, while sitting right next to you ( in a restaurant, an airport waiting area, even in church) carry on a conversation with your being aware of nothing more than a low murmur.
CePS, on the other hand, usually use the very latest combination cell phone, computer, briefcase, filing cabinet, alarm clock, music/movie player, camera, dishwasher, and backscratcher, costing many times over what my cell phone would have had I paid for it.
But, for whatever reason, they find it necessary to hold these electronic marvels at some distance from their mouths and shout (in some cases, scream) at them.
Why do they do this? Of that I am not certain (would love to have your thoughts on that question), but I think it must be for one or both of two reasons.
Perhaps CePS, due to some genetic shortcoming, are unable to recognize some of the simpler laws of physics, not wired to grasp the idea of vibrations moving through a fluid (air in this case).
They simply don't realize that by moving the phone's microphone to one's lips and cupping your hand around it, even a whisper can be heard clearly on the other end.
But I think the more likely reason, in most cases, has nothing to do with physics.
It has to do with ego.
Mr.
CePS wants you, innocent bystander, to see his immensely expensive cell phone, computer...
and to hear his extremely important conversation.
The latter of which brings me back to the issue at hand.
As I wing my way to Dallas in the thankfully quiet (no CePS) cabin of a DC-9, I ponder the question of whether or not I should strike a blow for the correcting of society.
You see, the CePS in the gate area in Memphis gave me all the ammunition I need.
I learned, as did everyone else on that end of the terminal, that his company was submitting a bid to buy a piece of property.
The initial offer was to be 2.
3 million dollars, but they were prepared to go as high as 3.
9 million.
The trees (timber to those in the business) on the land were worth 1.
8 million.
Now, I know a million dollars isn't worth a whole lot any more, but still, this transaction was big enough that the details didn't need to be broadcast to the whole world.
So now the question is: Do I call the sellers of the land and let them know that the CePS and his people will go as high as 3.
9 mil? Shoot, I'll bet they would go 4.
5.
Why would I do this? It is none of my business, right? Ah, but it is my business, my friend.
It became my business and that of the public in general when the CePS blasted it into our consciousness like a circus ringmaster.
It's not just my business but also my duty.
My duty to correct society one dude at a time.
So, while I greatly appreciate these opportunities to do my part toward interjecting just a little civility back into society, I do not want those opportunities presenting themselves on a continuous basis by several hundred CePS while locked in a metal tube for hours on end.
Please don't allow cell phone use on airplanes in flight.
While there is still no definitive evidence that the use of such devices pose a threat to safety, common sense just shouts that allowing their use in flight is a really bad idea.
In the gate area in Memphis, while waiting to board a flight to Dallas, I was once again subjected to a consummate CePS (Cell Phone Shouter).
Yes, I could have simply gotten up and moved to a quieter area rather than sitting there allowing my eardrums to be assailed with what should have been a very private business discussion delivered at approximately 90 decibels (about the same as a front row seat at a rock concert), but I thought this might be an opportunity for "Correcting Society One Dude at a Time.
" Before going any further with my diatribe against this despicable situation, let me firmly establish the absolute righteousness of my position on this matter.
I get a new cell phone when my old one quits working.
Usually, this means the battery will no longer hold a charge and the device is so old a new battery is unavailable.
When this happens, I get the cheapest phone to be had (They give them to me free for extending my service plan.
I'm up to the year 2318 now).
So, on this cheapest of the cheap cell phone, I can, while sitting right next to you ( in a restaurant, an airport waiting area, even in church) carry on a conversation with your being aware of nothing more than a low murmur.
CePS, on the other hand, usually use the very latest combination cell phone, computer, briefcase, filing cabinet, alarm clock, music/movie player, camera, dishwasher, and backscratcher, costing many times over what my cell phone would have had I paid for it.
But, for whatever reason, they find it necessary to hold these electronic marvels at some distance from their mouths and shout (in some cases, scream) at them.
Why do they do this? Of that I am not certain (would love to have your thoughts on that question), but I think it must be for one or both of two reasons.
Perhaps CePS, due to some genetic shortcoming, are unable to recognize some of the simpler laws of physics, not wired to grasp the idea of vibrations moving through a fluid (air in this case).
They simply don't realize that by moving the phone's microphone to one's lips and cupping your hand around it, even a whisper can be heard clearly on the other end.
But I think the more likely reason, in most cases, has nothing to do with physics.
It has to do with ego.
Mr.
CePS wants you, innocent bystander, to see his immensely expensive cell phone, computer...
and to hear his extremely important conversation.
The latter of which brings me back to the issue at hand.
As I wing my way to Dallas in the thankfully quiet (no CePS) cabin of a DC-9, I ponder the question of whether or not I should strike a blow for the correcting of society.
You see, the CePS in the gate area in Memphis gave me all the ammunition I need.
I learned, as did everyone else on that end of the terminal, that his company was submitting a bid to buy a piece of property.
The initial offer was to be 2.
3 million dollars, but they were prepared to go as high as 3.
9 million.
The trees (timber to those in the business) on the land were worth 1.
8 million.
Now, I know a million dollars isn't worth a whole lot any more, but still, this transaction was big enough that the details didn't need to be broadcast to the whole world.
So now the question is: Do I call the sellers of the land and let them know that the CePS and his people will go as high as 3.
9 mil? Shoot, I'll bet they would go 4.
5.
Why would I do this? It is none of my business, right? Ah, but it is my business, my friend.
It became my business and that of the public in general when the CePS blasted it into our consciousness like a circus ringmaster.
It's not just my business but also my duty.
My duty to correct society one dude at a time.
So, while I greatly appreciate these opportunities to do my part toward interjecting just a little civility back into society, I do not want those opportunities presenting themselves on a continuous basis by several hundred CePS while locked in a metal tube for hours on end.
Please don't allow cell phone use on airplanes in flight.
Source...